When my brother and I were alone with Grandma when we visited her on weekends or during the summer, we were always listening to gossip about her neighbors, stories from her past, and how she scolded her son-in-law, our father. Dad was never the same to her.
– Only forty and so bald! Growing a belly. How can you even look at him? God forbid you should look like him!
His looks weren’t the only reason. Grandma didn’t like the fact that he worked a lot, but that he didn’t allow us or her everything. We don’t go to the seaside every year, so Dad doesn’t work much. But Mom, who does freelance sometimes and signed up for a lot of incomprehensible knitting courses, does everything right, and Dad still has to give her money to do it. But we’re not talking about Mom, we’re talking about Dad.
My dad’s a great dad. I’ve seen a lot of my family friends or classmates, and I know for a fact that our parents are terrific. We have everything, we have a good life, and my grandmother gets mad at my dad for something and just scolds him. I’m sixteen now, and I know exactly what she’s talking dirty about, but my brother’s only eight, and he listens to it and interprets it in no uncertain terms. I don’t know if my grandmother’s words will make him feel worse about my dad, too.
– What is there to love him for? Your father never lifted a finger to buy the apartment you live in. If it wasn’t for Grandpa and me, you’d be living in rented apartments. You should be grateful that we’ve been so supportive of you. What about the other grandparents? Divorced, with new families far away. I’m the only one you can stay with,” Grandma wailed all the time.
Dad heard his mother-in-law’s reproaches more than once, but my brother and I always came to comfort him when we were little, and now we do it when we are more or less adults. Grandma tries in every way to lower his self-esteem and make him less important to us, but my brother and I are always on my dad’s side. So, in fact, now that we have the choice of going or not going to visit her, we stay home. Grandma takes offense, complains to mom about us, not understanding why we do not seek to keep in touch with her.
I don’t even know if one day she will realize that by hurting our daddy, she hurts us, too.
