– I will not help my mother-in-law, she may not even hope to! – Emma shares. – I do not owe this woman anything, because she was fifteen years of our marriage with her son did not help us anything, neither financially nor physically. Not only that, but I haven’t even heard a kind word from her in all that time. She always told me that she did not owe me anything. Now I think she’s absolutely right, but now I don’t owe her anything either.
Emma has a perfectly classic case: two two year-old sons, an apartment that she and her husband worked for years to buy with a mortgage. Rimma is sure they only managed to pay off the mortgage thanks to her mother’s help. Of course her mother didn’t help them financially, but she took care of her daughter’s children completely: she took them to kindergarten, stayed with them on sick leave, then she took them to and from school, also she had to do her homework with her grandchildren, she took them to classes and activities, she fed and took them for walks.
All the while, Emma and her husband were busy earning money, because thanks to her mother they could fully devote themselves to work. Emma is sure that without her mother’s help they would have had practically nothing now, as it would have been difficult to work with a child of two years old in their arms.
All these years my mother-in-law lived only for herself. She saw her grandchildren only on holidays, as she always had more important things to do. Several times, Emma asked her mother-in-law to help with the children, but she each time she politely refused, saying that she had brought up her son by herself and that therefore she was not going to help anyone. After several refusals, Emma never asked her mother-in-law again.
– She was practically raising my children herself! – the girl shared. – Of course, I’m very grateful to my mother for her help. If she needs help, my husband and I will do anything for her. It’s different with my mother-in-law. I understand that she is the mother of a spouse and we have an obligation to help her, but we have no close relationship with her.
I can’t even imagine what she is hoping for? Does this woman think she will always be young and full of strength? And as you know, debts must always be repaid and no matter how you look at it, but love, respect and help must be earned…
And maybe it is necessary to be higher than that and in spite of everything you have to help your husband’s mother, just as you did with your own mother? Do you think that what you throw away will come back, or do we have to help our elderly parents no matter what?
