When my husband and I got married, we got a washing machine. It was the most expensive present. My brothers had to chip in on purpose to make us happy. After the wedding we moved into a rented apartment. My brothers lived close by, so we had to cross paths with our daughters-in-law. But our relations were strained.
My elder brother’s wife was very talkative, but harmless. The middle brother’s wife, Amanda, could be expected to do anything – aloof, withdrawn, silent. We hardly ever went to see each other, but our nephews came to see us all the time. Especially Amanda’s 6-year-old son and 4-year-old daughter.
They would come unannounced, open the door themselves and take whatever they wanted. I was very shy when I was young – I was afraid to even say a word to them. After my daughter was born the situation worsened. We lived very modestly, we had to save money on everything. I bought cookies, fruit, meat only for my daughter, and my husband and I made do with the rest.
My nephews felt free to go through all the drawers and make a search. I treated them, of course, but one piece wasn’t enough for them, they had to gobble it all up. When I was a kid, my parents taught me not to take anything without asking, but here it didn’t even smell like parenting. When I realized that words couldn’t solve the problem, I started closing the door. They could bang on and on for hours. Then my husband ran out of patience, he talked to them, and the runs stopped.
One day I was making dinner, and Amanda walked in without knocking. She did not even say hello, immediately asked:
– Where is the washing machine?
– In the bathroom, – I answered on the fly.
– Mine broke down, so I’ll take it. Your brother promised me a new one, and he took it and gave it to you. So I’m confiscating it!
– Your husband wasn’t the only one who gave it to me. All the brothers contributed.
– I don’t care who gave it to me. No one asked me, I didn’t agree. How am I supposed to do the laundry, with my hands? Get your laundry out of there quickly.
I started taking everything out and crying in anger. She didn’t even pay attention, took the washing machine and left. When I saw that she had hung up the laundry, I asked for the washing machine back. But in response I heard a categorical “no. My daughter-in-law treated me with impudence – she decided to solve the problem with her husband. He immediately went to his brother. They talked for a long time, came back and said:
– Amanda’s not going to change, apparently. When I lived with them before we got married, she drove me crazy, too. Don’t worry about the car, my brother promised me a new one. He kept his promise. My brother apologized for his wife, but there was nothing he could do about it.
I haven’t spoken to Amanda since, though it’s been years. She is lonely and perpetually discontented, she doesn’t even have any friends because of her stupid character. My daughter-in-law tried to establish communication with me, invited me to visit, but apparently I could not let go of old resentments.
As my daughter-in-law got older, she changed a little, became wiser or something. She realized that without friends and relatives it is difficult to survive in this world. I don’t alienate her, but I don’t let her close to me either.
Our children have grown up, they communicate with each other, but my nephew is a copy of Amanda when he was young. He even “cheated” his own father out of money. In general, genetics is genetics, or, as they say, you can’t take words out of my mouth.
