As of late, my mother started living on her own. She divorced my dad, and my brother lived with her for a while and then moved in with a girl. So she complained to me that it’s hard for her to be alone in a big house. It’s scary and lonely. Wanting someone to talk to. I felt sorry for her, so I decided to offer her to live with her sister. She lives on her own, too. But her mother didn’t like the idea very much. She says at that age it’s hard to get along in character.
When my brother left, my mother came to visit us a lot. Both on and off occasions. Sometimes on weekends, sometimes in the middle of the work week. We always welcomed her home and were glad when she came. And we visit her ourselves every chance we get. When we visit our matchmakers, we take her with us to the cottage. We do everything to make her feel less lonely.
Everything was fine until my husband and I had our son. On the pretext that she was going to help with her grandson, my mother asked to stay with us. This was after I came home from the maternity hospital. She gave us good arguments. We thought and thought about it and agreed. As it turned out, she did help a lot. She took care of the baby and helped me with household chores. Only we didn’t think that she would decide to stay almost forever. It’s been two months, and she does not think about leaving. She just started saying that there was no reason for her apartment to be empty – it was much more rational to let tenants in…
Both my husband and I are very grateful for her help. She does a lot of things for us. But we’re getting a little tired of her constant presence. We want some privacy. She is retired and doesn’t go out. She’s always at home. And she’s trying to do her own thing. She’s rearranging things.
She’s rearranging everything in the kitchen. And my husband and I do not have enough personal space. After all, not for nothing we decided to live separately. We are a young family. Our apartment is not big enough for one more person to live in. Besides, we can’t go around the house naked. It’s stressful. My mother started telling us how to live and where to spend our money. My mother is pecking at my husband for not helping me.
I tried to talk to my mother frankly. And I try to make her understand that young families need to live separately. Only she does not agree with my arguments. According to her, it’s normal to live with your mother. And parents cannot cope with taking care of an infant on their own. After all, an infant is a big responsibility. I don’t know how to get through to the mother, how to explain to her that she has already become unwanted and annoying. I feel sorry for her, that she is alone in her old age.
But it’s nobody’s fault that she divorced her father. She can always find herself a new man…
